_   _
 [ x x ] cDc communications
  \   /  Global Domination Update #19
  (' ')  December 1st, 1994
Est. 1984

New gNu NEW gnU new GnU nEW gNu neW gnu nEw GNU releases for December, 1994:

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291-299: Nine Christmas/Holiday/Cold Arctic Wasteland-related stories.
Some are funny, some are disturbing, and some will make you VERY AWARE of every
single PORE on your NOSE.

* cDc - DOWN HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS (1994).  Dolly Parton, Kenny Rogers, Olivia
Newton-John, Clint Black.  Gather 'round the tree and enjoy a rousing duet of
Kenny and Olivia singing "Jingle Bell Rock" while Ms. Parton gets drunk and
embarasses herself.  Directed by Martin Scorsese.  (Drug Use, Adult Language,
Graphic Violence, Strong Sexual Content).

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     "In their workshops, the elves toil under the oppressive eyes of the
redshirts.  The Eskimos are all but extinct, and the dentists pull tooth after
whalebone tooth from the charred skulls of their remnants.

     Oh, the twinkling blue Aryan eyes!  There is blood on his cheeks!

     He trains mighty legions in his impregnable northern fortress.  The Lapps
have come to fear the sound of marching boots and jingling bells.

     With his newest sleigh, he can strike any European city in under twenty

     Good children get a switch in their stocking.  The bad ones disappear.

                                             -Andrew Solberg

                                   - x X x -

Conspicuous consumption of cDc products will fill the empty, gnawing voids you
may or may not feel in your life... which become all the more apparent at
ridiculous hours of the night as carbonated beverages gradually wear away your
stomach lining and ulcers work their own little brand of magic.

Things to look forward to in 1995:

  cDc #300 - Cow Beat #3: "Teen Idling on the Inphomashun Hi-Mom-I'm-on-TV-way"
  cDc FACK: "Frequently Anointed Cows are K-rad."  Or something.

I could give you promises of Twinkies and a cool, like, Yaga t-shirt.  Will you
be happy then?  From here to eternity we will shop.  We will shop at The Mall
and buy only the finest in fashions and Rage Against the Toaster will provide
the aural motivation.  "Fuck you, Mom, I won't clean my room like you tell me."

Go to HoHoCon and it'll be cool.  Ramada Inn South.  1212 West Ben White Blvd.
Austin, Texas.  Friday, December 30th through Sunday the 1st.

Shop!  Shop!  Do the booty hop!  The leather store has a sale on biker jackets,
Harley accessories optional and in-stock.  New tats shine with gleaming
disinfectant.  Bright red-skinned jolly pierceings, and sparkling sterling
silver!  On the tongue, through the lip.  Susy's got a charming new necklace,
and Little Johnny has a delightful new nose ring!  "Come over here, Johnny, so
Aunty Emma can see your newest hole."

Make new holes and fill 'em up.

As cDc stalks around, hunting the logical conclusions.  Ho.

S. Ratte'
cDc/Editor and P|-|Ear13zz |_3@DeRrr
"We're into t-files for the groupies and money."
Middle finger for all.

Write to: cDc communications, P.O. Box 53011, Lubbock, TX  79453.
Internet: sratte@phantom.com.

  cDc Global Domination Update #19-by Swamp Ratte'-"Hyperbole is our business"
  Copyright (c) 1994 cDc communications.  All Rights Reserved.