_ _ ((___)) cDc communications [ x x ] Global Domination Update #28 \ / "A Special Message of Hope" (' ') December 24th, 2000 (U) FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE A TIME OF GREAT REFLECTION IS UPON US A lot of major events have happened since the last Update... the release of Back Orifice and BO2K, a completely redone web page, and the formation of cDc's Hacktivismo subdivision. But since our birth in 1984, the bread-and- butter of cDc is our routine creative output. That's what these updates are about, and act as sort of a "State of the Union' address to fill you fine, upstanding, sexy folks in on the progress of The Struggle. The United Arab Emirates have recently banned access to our web page from the grasp of their citizens. Why? Because the international press has gotten wind of and started to write about Hacktivismo's upcoming "Project X" - which promises to bypass Internet censorship. Watch for more in the upcoming months. It's a traditional manger scene where Mary and Joseph beam with wonder at the radiant baby Jesus, the wise men and shepherds doing likewise. The animals are milling about in the background when a cow munching on straw picks up the baby Jesus by the head and starts chewing. "OH MY GOD!!! It's eating the Messiah!!!" Jesus' little baby legs kick wildly and the frantic parents, wise men, shepherds and maybe an angel or two rush around smacking the cow on the head while tugging on the baby's legs in a desperate attempt to free him. "Bad cow! BAD COW! Don't eat the Messiah! Stop eating the Messiah, cow! BAD COW!!!" And that, boys and girls, is why we make hamburgers from cows to this very day. "Manger Scene" by Scott Christensen. _________________________________/ - x X x - \______________________________ _ _ information is junk mail: _ _ ((___)) THE TEDIUM IS THE MESSAGE ((___)) [ x x ] _ [ x x ] \ / _ |_|_ _ _|_ _|_ |_ _ _| _ _. _| _ _ \ / (' ') (_|_|| |_ (_) | |_ | |(/_ (_|(/_(_|(_| (_(_)\_/\_/ (' ') (U) (U) deal with it presents unto you our personal gift of love deal with it S U C K E R NEW RELEASES S U C K E R __________________________________/new audio\_______________________________ "We make hardcore jams, so fuck respect..." -Eazy E 248:"What You Thinkin' 'Bout" by Lo-Pro. This slowed-down, banging gangsta track features the advanced lyrical stylings of Luck and Sage from one of the hardest crews in Texas, the LBK Mafia. All-original music by xxxclusive and Grandmaster Ratte' of cDc. Featuring no damn samples, period. 249:"DemonSeed's Night Before X-Mas" by Myles Long. A startling tale of personal redemption, as Long dictates. Script kiddie pays with his sins with his life, as DemonSeed Elite strikes with his mighty astral monster truck. 250:"cDc's NSF Holiday Training" by Delchi. There's no "off season" for the cDc Ninja Strike Force! You fool!! Suffer!! Aagh!! _________________________________/ - x X x - \______________________________ _ _ ((___)) CULT OF THE DEAD COW [ x x ] \ / wishes you and (' ') your charming family "((U)& a ( )""""& VERY MERRY HOLIDAY SEASON! &&&&&( .) &&&( )""""& """"&&&&&( )& &&&"""""""&&( ( )&&&&&&&&&&""""" &&&&&( )"""""&&&( )& ( )&&""""""&&( )&&&&&&&&& """"""( )&&&&&&( )&&&&( )& /\___/\ &( )&&&&&&&&( )&&&&&&&"""&& | @ x | )&&&&&( )&&&&""""""___\|/_&& cDc Likes You Best, __\_^_/__ ___\|/___ &&&&& | ||| | All Year 'Round! (__/ooM\__)|___|||___| |___|||___| (__\___/__) _______________________________/new text files\_____________________________ 376:"cDc's Guide to Sexually Transmitted Diseases" by Myles Long. This former Eastern-European porn star pulls it all out and lays it on the table for you regarding STD's. 377:"My Life as Santa's Rubber-Clad Love Slave" by Scott Christensen. It's It's tough being an elf... you can't reach very high, and you're easy to tie up and throw in a closet. _________________________________/ - x X x - \______________________________ From: firstname.lastname@example.org To: email@example.com Subject: Stupid I am a 44 year old x-marine and I like the martial arts. I stumbled up on this sick sight and would like to invite your bad-ass's over for a lesson any time some of the sick cows are in my area. I would like to practice my neck breaking tech. on a stupid cow. I live in Fulton, Ms. and work for the city utility dept. I am not hard to find. Ask for the Recon. Ranger Eddy. _________________________________/new visuals\______________________________ 1:"Build The Future" by Myles Long. A long, hard road is ahead! 2:"Anime Chicks Dig cDc" by Satoshi "Toy" Igarashi. Anime girl sitting around. Yep. 3:"Good Ol' Boy" by unknown. George W. Bush, the shape-shifting reptile- beast, looking goofy. _________________________________/ - x X x - \______________________________ Thanks to the following recent items of influence: MUSIC: OutKast, At The Drive-In, Juvenile, AC/DC FOOD: sweet-potato casserole PRINT: F.E.D.S. magazine, _The Secret Doctrine of the Kabballah_ WAREZ: Defender, via MacMAME JEWELRY: iced-down pinkie ring HOT SEX: yer momma, ha ha... A brief interview with Count Zero/cDc: CZ: "What you want to talk about? They ain't my kids and I don't know that chick. Whatever they told you, I don't know that chick." Thanks, Zero! Fools better recognize: CULT OF THE DEAD COW is a gift to the women of this world and trademark of cDc communications. Established in 1984, cDc is the longest-running crew in the telecom underground worldwide, and inventor of the "e-zine." Every issue is produced on an Apple ][ for genuine tru-skool flavor. You thirst for our body of work, you know you do. Find it at the cDc Global Domination Factory Direct Outlets: World Wide Web: www.cultdeadcow.com Usenet: alt.fan.cult-dead-cow BBS: 806/794-4362 Entry:KILL For further information, write: Email: firstname.lastname@example.org Postal: cDc, 1369 Madison Ave. #423, New York, NY 10128, USA xoxoxo, Grandmaster Ratte' cDc Warrior-Priest-King "We're into telecom for the groupies and money. Bling bling." __//////\ -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- /\\\\\\__ Est. 1984 \\\\\\/ NINJA STRIKE FORCE * HACKTIVISMO \////// Est. 1984 #### We will have more to say.