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"Hey, Paula. My wiener's bigger than your nose."
-- William Jefferson Clinton, Prez
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE GLOBAL DOMINATRIX UPDATE
_________________ http://www.cultdeadcow.com/cDc_files/ ____________________
_ _
((___))
[ x x ] cDc Communications
\ / Global Dominatrix Update #25
(' ') May 1st, 1998
(U)
Est. 1984
- * -
Hell's been a' poppin' with the cDc since our last Global Dominatrix
Update. We're gettin' famous all over Russia. No shit. The Russian
version of Computerworld put out an article about us. Hey, Igor - send me
some fuckin' vodka. Oh yeah, and those rat bastids in Beijing are still
searchin' high and low for the Hong Kong Blondes. The day those dickheads
find Blondie Wong will be the day George Michael learns to keep his dick
in his dungarees. What else? Um, uh, who cares? We don't have time to
write these update things. Just read the files, ya foul smellin', black
clothes wearin', eunuchs [sp?] lovin' techno weasels.
________________________________/text files\________________________________
351:"The Tao of Windows Buffer Overflow" by Dildog. If it wasn't for
Chairman Bill, hackers would have almost nothin' to do. Take Microsoft's
Netmeeting 2.1, for instance. Really take it. Wheeee.
352:"Remembrance of Things Past" by Pixie. So young, so wise. What can you
say about a girlie that makes sense when those so-called digerati over at,
er, what's the name of that shitty magazine? Aw, how cares? Just read this!
353:"Pulp Philosophy" by Shadeshifter. Greece was the birthplace of Olivia
Newton-John and John Travolta. It was also the birthplace of sodomy and
the Socratic dialogues. Quod licet Jovi, non decit bovi. ooM.
354:"Unchained" by Isis. She planted more wood in the American heartland
than the U.S. Forrestry Service with her last file (cDc #344). And now
you're bound to love her - and will come to respect her - as we all have.
355:"Shit-Burnin'" by Cal Jacobson. This high security document was just
leaked to the cDc. Learn the truth about how your tax dollars are spent.
Somethin's got a high stank on it, and it ain't Sunspot's cologne. Whew.
File submissions: omega@cascade.net
- * -
Thanks to the following items of influence this time around:
WAREZ: Anything by Mudge or Brian Oblivion
PRINT: Cool Beans!, Utne Review, Le Devoir, in that order
MUSIC: Liam Teague [ya heard it here first], Oh Sussanah, Holly McNarland
RERUNS: Veggie's Interview on Dateline
BEVERAGES: Extra Old Rum
CLUB: The Boatyard [Bridgetown, Barbados] *damn can those girls wind*
_______________________________/shout outs!\________________________________
* You've seen RealDoll. But have you seen Dummy Cow?
http://www.gencor.ca/imv/dummy_cow/
* Carolyn Meinel: Gotcher note, babe. Apology accepted.
But we're still going to have to write "Can't play well with others"
in your permanent record.
* Finally, someone who realizes how ridiculously stupid the "Wow, I can
watch TeeVee on my cOmPuTeR!" hype is. I wonder if the dolts at Red
Herring and Wired have read this?
http://www.theonion.com/onion3308/realtimetv.html
* >Date: Tue, 03 Feb 1998 23:17:04 -0600
>From: Brad <hexum@rmi.net>
>Subject: Word on the Street is....
>
>Yo,
>
>This is Acidload from The Warez Reserve Online Service. I recently got
>shut down by the SPA and am running my BBS still on my t3.
A T3. If you're gonna make shit up, Brad, why don't you really go for
broke? Why dontcha tell all your |-|0m1ez that your WWIV BBS is running
on an OC-12?
>I'm also founder of the wwobn-crew, elite member of cult of the dead cow,
3L1t3 m3Mb3R 0v cDc?!?! tH1z 1z Gn00z 2 u$!
>and kan. Anyway I'm back in business and I'm not letting no fucking
>government agency shut me down so I need to get in with a couple more
>strong organizations out there.
A rad \/\/aR3zZz d00d like you shouldn't have any problems.
_______________________________/ - x X x - \________________________________
Fools better recognize: CULT OF THE DEAD COW is a gift to the women of
this world and the trademark of cDc communications. Established in 1984,
the cDc is the largest and oldest krewe in telecom, inventor of the e-zine
and stool loosener to sysadmins everywhere. Each and every issue is
produced on an Apple II for genuine effect. Yo, bee-atch! Find the flavor
at these fine locations:
World Wide Web: http://www.cultdeadcow.com
http://www.L0pht.com/cdc.html
Usenet: alt.fan.cult-dead-cow
BBS: 806/794-4362 Entry:KILL
Any questions, jackass?
Grandmaster Ratte'
cDc/Phat Daddy & Pontiff
Email: sratte@cascade.net
Postal: POB 53011, Lubbock, TX, 79453, USA
"cDc. Hyperbole is our business."
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Copyright(c)1998 Oxblood Ruffin, Haile UnLikely & cDc communications